By Ashley Powell, MSW, LISW-S ·
Does Time Heal All Wounds?
I grew up hearing the old saying “time heals all wounds.” I’m sure you’ve heard this a time or two as well. I did some research and the saying “time heals all wounds” is said to have originated around 190BC by a Roman Poet. That means for centuries we have kept this idea alive! However, have we found any truth to this idea?
Opinions will vary, but my personal and professional belief is no, time does not heal all wounds. I have counseled individuals in their 70s who held deep wounds from childhood. Our life experiences run through the course of our life like a scarlet thread. We are who we are based on the experiences that we have. Whether they be joyous or painful…they create the present version of ourselves. When we have a painful experience, we have a choice as to what we do with that pain. Not all wounds have to bleed out for the rest of our lives. They can heal and scar over. The scar reminds us that the past and pain was real, but it doesn’t bleed anymore. In fact, our greatest scars can become our greatest story of victory.
I once heard a male athlete boast about his scars saying “I earned these!” While I chuckle at the memory, I believe he spoke much truth! We earn our emotional scars! Scars are evidence that healing has taken place. Healing is not an easy process. Emotional healing requires honesty, responsibility, vulnerability, persistence, and grace for ourselves throughout the process.
However, when we deal with our pain improperly, we consequently trap the pain within ourselves and create emotional dysfunction. This comes in many different forms such as bitterness, anger, resentment, addiction, acts of rebellion, crippling fear/anxiety, and depression. The list could go on….
From a Christian perspective, I believe the devil invites us to associate shame with our pain so that we keep it hidden in the darkness, unhealed and forever bleeding into our life. Shame sends us a message that there is something wrong with us, thus developing negative core beliefs about who we are.
Whether it’s from feelings of shame, fear, or simply not knowing how to heal…many of us sit in our pain far too long. We avoid facing our pain and emotional wounds at times because vulnerability is uncomfortable. Maybe we’ve never had healthy coping skills demonstrated to us and we don’t even know where to start. Maybe you feel broken beyond repair and numbing the pain feels like your only option. I don’t know what your situation is, but I do know that all of us experience emotional pain at times. I also know that time unfortunately does not heal these wounds.
I invite you to turn your emotional wounds over to our Heavenly Father. He is a loving and forgiving God eager to find a space in your heart. Even as Christians we are not immune to the woes of this world. God did not create pain, sin created pain. No matter how deep the wound, God wants you to expose it to Him. God cannot heal what we choose to conceal….give it over to Him.
Therapy is a powerful equipping tool. If you need guidance and support in your healing journey, I encourage you to seek professional therapy.
Being Brave with You,
Ashley
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." ~ Matthew 11:28-30