By Ashley Powell, MSW, LISW-S ·
Riptide
At times, the current of life is treacherous. The waters ebb and flow as you navigate with a broken compass. The ground beneath your feet is swiftly moving and your posture is unsteady. The weight of the water seems heavier as the current increases, draining you of all vitality. It’s easy to get lost in the flow and feel as if you’re losing all direction.
Have you ever felt like this? I’ve had seasons of life that felt like I was bracing myself against two rocky walls while attempting not to fall into the rushing riptide! I would catch my breath only to hold it again…eventually feeling depleted of all strength and overtaken by life’s current. These are moments when I felt like time stood still. As if time was moving and life was evolving for everyone but myself. I wonder if you’ve ever felt like this. Many of us have and will…
Actual riptides can be quite dangerous. They can occur suddenly and sweep you away rather quickly. Doesn’t this sound a bit like life? It’s in these moments that we become anxious, depressed, and void of all hope. I’ve witnessed it over and over again. I want to tell you about “Julie.” Julie held her face in her hands as emotion swept in. Tears fell down her face as the sobering reality of her situation came to the surface. I simply sat with her in that emotion for a long time. It’s important that we have moments likes these. Moments to acknowledge the pain we’ve (perhaps) been avoiding and time to process the pieces of it.
Julie was experiencing a riptide of life. Julie’s world changed drastically and suddenly, after a tragic accident left her husband in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. An accident that was witnessed by their son, who now was struggling with trauma. Julie tried with all her strength to “keep it together.” For a while, she smiled through the pain and proclaimed nothing but gratitude that her husband was still alive. She was indeed grateful, but inside she was terrified and wrecked. Julie was struggling to comfort their son and provide him with the emotional support he needed. Julie was struggling to assume the role as caretaker for her spouse who was adjusting to life in a wheelchair. Julie began to feel that she was getting lost in the current of life that was sweeping all that she had known away. What happened that day, was Julie finally breaking. This was actually a good thing….
So often we resist the reality of our brokenness. We pretend we aren’t suppressing the emotional pain from life. The truth is that we are all participating in one giant masquerade. We wear masks as we run for cover, avoiding the next unexpected cataclysm. In hiding, we convince ourselves that we are “fine.”
I’m not depressed….
I’m not living in fear…..
I’m not struggling….
I don’t need to slow down….
I don’t need people in my life…..
I’m fine….
If we could only open our eyes and acknowledge the fact that we are drowning, we might make it to safety. My dad had a mild fear of water. Vacations to the beach would always consist of what I considered at the time to be a “lecture.” My dad would caution us on the danger of riptides. He would warn us that resisting it (by trying to swim to shore) would only make our situation worse. A riptide is not something you can swim against. Instead, we should swim “with it” by swimming parallel.
Wow, my soul truly leaps as I write this….
Julie didn’t need to “be strong” she needed to be broken! She needed to look her situation in the eye and call it by name. Once she did that, she was no longer a slave to it. She began the process of finding safety in that riptide. But first….she needed to acknowledge that she was there.
Indeed, this is a painful lesson that I have walked through many times. I wonder if this resonates with you too?
Jesus, didn’t shy away from darkness. He embraced it. He called it by name and walked straight into Hell for us as he conquered it.
There are moments in life that we need to do the same. Open your eyes, be courageous as you acknowledge reality. Look to the Lord for wisdom and He will lead you to safety.
Being Brave with You,
Ashley
Though an army besiege me,<br>my heart will not fear;<br>though war break out against me,<br>even then I will be confident.
Psalm 27:3